Every weekend it’s been an unintended virtue for me to browse YouTube, and then suddenly, I found this:

And for a moment, I was laughing hard, and at the same time, tried to remember a similar scenario in a Filipino movie.

And since I have greater than 50% memory recall (which I hope is good, because it seems to be a liability when it comes to forgetting how a certain pair of “people persons” betrayed me), I remembered this very weird movie entitled “Double Dribble”, which topbills acting legend Maricel Soriano and Purefoods Basketball Team Manager, then 5-time PBA MVP, Alvin Patrimonio. As soon as I start telling you the story, you’d be scratching your head and asking, “Why the hell is this movie posted here in the first place?”

I’m Sitting on a Rocking Chair

The story is about two identical twin brothers separated by their parents’ separation. I can’t remember the character names, but the idea was to make the first twin a basketball icon (like Alvin Patrimonio in real-life back then), as he was staying with a disciplined mother, and the other living in a Manila slum area, working as your common blue-collar guy, with a kid under his roof (can’t remember if she, played by Aiza Seguerra, was his daughter). Basketball Twin is a heartthrob and, like your typical and real-life heartthrob, has the habit of breaking every girls’ hearts. One time, in a dream, a Lighted Being (I dunno if this is God, but he doesn’t feel like one, so for this post’s purposes, I’ll be using the safe HE and HIS) told him HE would punish Basketball Twin. Soon enough, the moment he wakes up, he becomes a she (which is played by Maricel Soriano). Freaked with how things turned out, he seeks his long lost brother to play decoy for him/her (I’m getting confused now) and teach Poor Twin good basketball. Poor Twin, for the entire duration of the movie, never had the idea that the girl walking in front of his doorsteps was actually his brother!

Things got topsy-turvy as the story went on and the movie’s climax ended in a championship game, where Poor Twin wins the cup, and Basketball Twin (who is now a lady), rejoices and hugs Poor Twin. Then the story ends with Basketball Twin praying to HIM for enlightenment, to know how she would deal with his/her identity crisis, if he/she would go on living as a woman, hopelessly in love with Poor Twin (yeah, I’m scratching my head too while I’m writing this). Then while confronting HIM, he/she suddenly realized he/she would want to keep his/her femininity, and also his/her secrets of being Poor Twin’s IDENTICAL TWIN BROTHER (You can do it! You can finish this post!). And for some magical reason, HE granted Basketball Twin lifetime womanhood and the blessing to be wed to her (Basketball Twin is officially a woman at this point) identical twin. The light goes out inside the church, and Poor Twin finds her, and they hugged, and kissed as if they’re sucking the phlegm out of their lungs.

And the Moral of the Story is…

None.

Well, I could extract a few lessons from this movie though – that basketball heartthrobs and womanizers have the greatest potential of being gay among all men on Earth, that if God really has something to do with our decisions, it’s just the “formality” of them, and that if God allowed marriage, He would also allow same-sex and same-genes marriage. I know, I know. It’s pretty f***ed up, right? I’m just translating their message, not necessarily agreeing with them.

Controversial as it may seem, the movie seemed to have faded out of my fellow-Pinoy’s memories. I mean, this one might even kick “Oldboy” in the balls! (If you know what I mean)

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Even on Sundays at 3AM, you can get news like this: Manila set to welcome Elliott

The best Idol contender ever, IMO, will come visit the Philippines to promote his album. Well, I’m not a freak fan of his, but we share the same feeling of worshiping Stevie Wonder. I always liked his style. Season 5 of American Idol is indeed the best season ever, knowing that they had Elliott Yamin, Chris Daughtry, and season winner Taylor Hicks to topbill its last few episodes.

I’m marking September 22 now, hoping I could come visit his album promotion in Glorietta, and have a signed album for myself.

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